Hope

This whole time that I have... well as long as I can remember I have felt that I haven't been living up to my potential.  I felt that there was something that was missing.  I understand that everyone has something that is wrong with them.  Well maybe not necessarily wrong with them, but some trial, some problem that is holding them back from complete self awareness.  I have a discovered something while reading.  I have discovered that what I am lacking is hope.  I decided that I was lost, and that I was not going to be able to change for the better.  This is false.  Every time that I feel I am not good enough or that I am not doing good for someone else it makes me want to be that much better.  This want has become the driving force in my life.  The desire to make myself better than I thought possible.  I still feel that I am missing something that I have much left to grow, and I do.  We all do.  But there is a step that takes closer.  That step is the knowledge of what is wrong and the courage and will to try and change that.  This truth is what I have been lacking.  I have not felt that I was going in the right direction, but I was and still am.  Any improvement is enough, no matter how small.  Someone very far away from the right place but going in the right direction is in better position than someone very close to the right place but facing the wrong direction.  I just had to turn around and see the right place.  I have taken the first step in my long never ending journey.  A small step, but a step all the same.